My Life log - Blog

My Relationship with an Abuser: Don’t Make My Mistakes

NOVEMBER 26, 2018

The worst thing in my life is that I was married to a man who emotionally destroyed me. Trends toward abusive behavior appeared even when we were dating. However, I still married him. I knew that he was terrible in anger, but I hoped that this would change over time or I would change myself and leave him. The situation cleared up when we began to live together. He came home after work and shouted at me for what I did wrong. Half an hour later, he was behaving as if nothing had happened, and I was confused. I literally walked on tiptoes because I was afraid that I would disappoint him. Once I could not stand it and told him that everything was over. I gathered my things and went to my friend. My husband called me, wrote touching messages and eventually persuaded me to go back. He swore that he would change, that he realized how much he had hurt me and that his behavior was unacceptable.

Don’t ever go back.

Of course, I gave in because we were not enemies, and we loved each other. At that time, it was just difficult for me to believe how cruelty could be hidden behind this bright feeling. I was back. He really changed for a while: he was gentle, caring, and even romantic. He never laid a hand on me, but the time spent together gave him the opportunity to come up with more sophisticated tactics of violence. He began to control me. He made all the decisions that concerned both of us, he never asked what I thought or wanted, and when I talked about this, he just ignored. Once I heard the following phrase, “I am the only man here, and it means that only I can set the rules and give orders. You must obey me, as you are my wife.” On the same day, I made an appointment with a psychotherapist. Thanks to therapy and communication with close people, I managed to find the strength to stand up for myself when my husband tried to take me down a peg. I was ashamed to complain, to tell my parents about my problems, and it was even scary to call any authorities which would help me as an abuse victim. Few people take seriously the issue of emotional abuse.

Don’t convince yourself that you had it coming.

When I talk about what happened, it sounds as if it was my fault, people can say, "You didn’t leave when you realized that your husband was a tyrant, you just endured." However, this is nonsense, isn’t it? Is it my fault that he treats people like things? Didn’t I deserve normal human happiness? What about him? How to be a person who constantly needs to control and humiliate other ones? I feel bad for my husband because I love him. When he faced resistance on my part, he offered to divorce. It was unbearable to realize that nothing could be fixed, but I agreed. It is terrible to remain alone, but it is even more terrible to live all my life in fear that one day his behavior will go beyond the limits. Everything can become even worse when there are children in such a family because they have to carry this burden too. These thoughts helped me leave forever. Now I live alone, I work and travel a lot to forget this nightmare, I am in search for a new meaning and impressions that could feed my soul.

Sex as Means of Self-Assertion: How I’ve Coped with It

November 24, 2018

Someone cannot find a person who would be ready to satisfy all their guilty pleasures, while another one just needs to feel desirable and sexual. Talking about me, I faced the fact that sex had turned into a means of self-affirmation, hiding insecurity and lack of respect for myself. Nobody talks about sexual addiction in my circle, it is written off as if it is not a problem at all. Nonetheless, the need for sex reminds the need for alcohol or nicotine, it changes lifestyle and impacts psychologically. I want to tell you how I realized my toxic sexuality, how I overcame this addiction and got back to normal.

I thought I was every partner’s dream.

My apartment was filled with sex toys, I was interested in satisfying the most diverse desires of my partners and, besides, I were ready to have sex anytime and anywhere. I thought that I was the dream of any partner. However, despite this, all my relationships fell apart. I did not understand why everything is happening this way because I was so open and so well-versed in sex.

All this time I tried to solve the problems in the only way I knew: I woke up my partner with a morning sex, sent them hot messages during the day, and in the evening, I prepared a romantic dinner with sex for dessert. However, all this did not work out, but it made the situation worse. I thought I was good at it but I failed again and again. Any sex with a partner was something that I had bought.

I complained and was upset, I pressed on a partner and made them feel guilty if they didn’t want to have sex. Since I felt very insecure in this matter, we broke up. Over time, I started a new relationship, and the same problem appeared again.

A big step towards a new life.

Once, when I persuaded my partner to make love quickly before work, they asked me, “Do you really want sex? Are you excited?" At that time, I realized that I did not want sex, but I needed it. I didn’t know why I wanted it, I thought that it was necessary to want it. However, when I understood this, it was already too late: I was used to doing what I did, I was used to asking for sex, to searching for it, to thinking about it as about an important component of relationships.

We broke up for the same reason. I was alone again, but this time, instead of looking for a new partner, I decided to focus on my thoughts and desires. For a month I did not ask anybody out, I did not communicate with the people in a romantic way, I was just living my life and then I noticed that I was absolutely calm. Yes, I masturbated, but very rarely, only 4 times a month. I stopped feeling desperate, dependent, obliged to satisfy any desire of my partner even before they had it. The lack of a partner and the absence of a relationship made me stop being afraid that I was a bad sexual partner, that I didn’t satisfy or couldn’t satisfy someone in bed.

So, if you feel that you are sex-addicted, and this fact spoils your life all the time, try to sort things out and understand the root cause of your desire. Everything might be much simpler than you can even imagine.

You don’t know the world

August 4, 2016

Reading does not mean that is left, change to know real talent, everyone has the advantage of expanded ten times, has the advantages of small also is to let people say, everyone’s shortcomings to expand tenfold, others don’t hate will choose silence, in this materialistic world, we learned to endure, we learned to change, not obtained with our pursuit of, but with the life to, many demands for naught. Many memorable become the wounds, we only obtained is waiting for dead time is getting closer.
See beyond a person needs to have the consolidation of internal force of what they, then guess a person must have the talent, our every minute, the goal of classification of life, every decision we, are likely to become failure, but we still believe that success in front of us, success is easy to walk into, in fact, the fastest success is from the death of a step closer, then make money opportunities less, circle of friends small, you will know what loneliness is growing the fastest time, you will try to figure out, you can guess.
Everyone has weaknesses, each people have the experience of failure, pass by the scenery, or look at the expression, we experience is the sniper thinking, or resolve expression, for individuals, ordinary people like the, is to resolve the chase, for the struggle of the people, prefer to challenge to catch the sniper thinking, selection of risk, climbing to its peak, when we discerned, high feeling extremely cold, see through the laughing at others, in fact, our true ridicule is poor themselves.
Alive, is not only to eat and drink, in order to avoid the parents will let others despise, to leave the family to say his smile is moved by oneself, so most of the time, move others, not their own, but others experience the landscape and people. Later, we learn sense move on their own, just know, pay is not so easy to insist on, back has not had the young, even all the land, also can stand up, without tongue without eloquence, but we still have a heart to continue to wait for the heart.

Marking time

March 7, 2016
Wind and moon, teaYingying, but way embarrassed!


Bad words to miss time, marking the distance traveled time:


When rain completed poem, when the completion of the war, when the snow hasturned


Back and staring out of the window, in the dappled shadow picked up a bit ofindifference among alienated!


Memory, insomnia, Trek to the Glen and Dandan oath; Miss, did not sleep,wandering in the strange land before your eyes; snow, light, in strangecorners, carrying dismay and beating for months


, Single, in front of the hourglass of time once again froze, frozen hopegaze dissipation of 1100 degrees!


Once wondered if the summer is going to be a rolling snow covered my sorrow.Now, when there was a rumble of Thunder in the winter to intimidate myhesitation. Lonely winter nights, who is


Flood my thoughts? No sleep, who let the tears blurred my eyes?


Different season, I still think of the flowing haze, the same melody, why myface was pale? Stories buried under fallen leaves, dry in the time, if itpicks up and


Unfinished plot can be broken in a period completion?


Bright flowers, just lost yesterday show the wet mark little, can’t rememberwhen tears were living on my pillow. If our emotions run aground in destined to miss how quiet tea


China, and see that Misty spring? Blue addiction, the proliferation ofrestaurants the night they laugh I’m so stupid, why sorrow out of me I‘vegone mad, sentimentally unwanted attachment!


Awake is the fear of the future, want to sleep, arms ever sad


—-Night, total emotion, hateful cannot find the next day, tonight, as appropriate, for a long time, the pen meeting, not for him, recycling thepast, marking time.

Cartier flew to Buenos Aires and began negotiations

January 22, 2016

Make your daily life more colorful and enjoyable by buying one of exclusive Replica Panerai watches. Article Source: the greatest deals and steals from Watches – On – Net. ) The skin may be the body’s largest organ, it depends on many factors to keep healthy and strong. The time piece face is silver and features the Maori tattoo. The precise Panerai watches are actually famous because of their first-rate workmanship in extreme situations and dangerous environments, and eagerly collected by collectors. A, French Jeweller and watch manufacturer, was founded in 1847 by Louis-Francois Cartier and over the years it has led that is a in making quality, elegant and trendy watches as well as jewellery. These models include styles for males, women, and unisex models. But with this watches you could be sure of excellent quality products which have a durability. She has become seen wearing a white gold Cartier Tank Americaine with diamonds as well as the late Princess Diana of Wales who wore the Cartier Tank in yellow gold with a full bracelet. That turned out being most with the traction for the purpose we now know when the watch. You must be aware about the fake replica watches which can be present inside market today. They may be a very memorable gift for any single russian women and guarantee an ideal look for all women and for all occasions. ‘ He claims to get gotten it from a web based prop store. Learning Argentina concerned to adopt an anti-monopoly policy and force some industries to reduce their production, Cartier flew to Buenos Aires and began negotiations with law makers. You should discover how to guard neglect the so that you simply are not wasting cash. Do keep in mind the actual value of present seriously isn’t measured by cost. Completing these smaller tasks could make the stress more manageable and increases the chances of you success. These people know the price of Cartier watches and the way wearers from the same come up with a fashion statement wherever they go. The chunky-looking dial has found a quick strategy to my heart. After all whenever they look at these timepieces they mostly admire the product quality, style and elegance. The crown is done up of black ceramic and is also domed with sapphire crystal. If you’d like something rather less ordinary, please take a crack at a Timex watch band invented with braided leather otherwise a subtle motif printed within this wrist watch band. The new works are sharing with the same purpose , that will definitely create a whole new round of “Ballon Bleu” fashion trend upon the unconstrained imagination of Cartier masters. The Pasha watches were the initial designed and manufactured timepieces by Cartier in 1933. Smart people know how to extract the top of all possible and these people lower your expenses money to obtain more.

Get The Brand Named Watched For Less Watches

November 24, 2015

Get The Brand Named Watched For Less Watches are a great way of making people punctual and on time. They are the efficient devices that are used by people to go to different places such as meetings, offices and to other important places. Today the watches are not just used to tell about the time but they are more of a fashion symbol for most people. There are many different brands of the watches that are always on a tight competition with each other. These watches are a great way of enhancing your personality and making you look different from others. You can easily become prominent and get noticed in any meeting or gathering with the help of wearing the best branded watch. These watches are considered to be a status symbol for most of the people, especially for those who are going out for the business meetings or other such important events. These watches are a symbol of sophistication and class. These watches are used to make the people look more elegant and classy. People get inspired by them and listen to them with more attention due to their great sense of style and carrying themselves in the best manner. It is not now very difficult to purchase the brand named watches for less. There are many retailers who can help you with buying the best branded watches at much affordable prices. The Rolex watches, Omega watches, Michelle watches, Cartier watches and Breitling watches etc. You can easily get the best looking mens Breitling watches as well as for the women at affordable prices. Purchasing these watches is not that hard now and you can easily change these watches and get the new watch by selling off your old watch when you get bored with them. It is very common for the people to get bored with one thing and they want to have the new and latest thing. For those people, the Rolex trade in watches is the best choice. In this way they can get a new Rolex watch by selling off their old watch. These watches can change the personality of the people to a great extent. Others listen to them with more attention and consider them as their role models when it comes to style and taste. The branded watches are for those sophisticated people who take these watches as a multifunctional and complex property rather than just being a time piece. They get noticed wherever they go and inspire the people around them

whole to have taken place in the details of a refreshing change

November 17, 2015

Dior Handbag Brand Story Christian Dior (abbreviated CD), has been synonymous with the dazzling haute couture. His gorgeous selection of high-end, superior fabrics showed dazzling, dazzling gorgeous and elegant ladies, and has never concerned about the fashion industry. He inherited a tradition of French haute couture, and always maintains high-level design of gorgeous line of fine workmanship, high society to meet the aesthetic taste of mature women, a symbol of French fashion on the highest spirit of Dior in Paris, the status of the brand very high. Dior is hailed this century, one of the best designers. In 1905, Dior was born in Normandy, France a business owner family, but had his family’s expectations, engaged in political learning, and the final shift due to personal aesthetic preferences, and met Picasso, Matisse, Dali and other artists. Began in 1935, “Le Figaro” of his paintings had also the price of 20 francs each, in Paris in the streets selling their own fashion art. In 1938 joined Robert Piquet the company, he served as assistant designer Pierre Balmain in 1942 to work with, this time he was in possession of the garment design and structure of such techniques. In 1946, Dior handbags introduced the first series of works – the “new style” so that he became famous. Then his design out of control: asymmetric skirt, vertical-type clothes, O-, A-type, Y-, H type, tulip type, Arrow . This series of originality of design, let him walk to the end The most fashion-mae Station. His hard work in Paris, the fashion industry for 10 years, the Paris women’s from the whole to have taken place in the details of a refreshing change. In 1947, Dior was awarded the United States, Neiman Marcus Award (Neiman Marcus Award) , 1950, France has been awarded to him, “Legion of Honor group” Medal (Remise de la Legion d’honneur). In 1957, Dior died of a heart attack in Italy. Dior in Paris after World War II not only restored the status of the center of fashion, but also single-handedly cultivated the design of two well-known masters: Pierre Cardin, Yves Saint Laurent. Dior’s new times that this company also pointed out that it is in Saint-Laurent, Make Bo Han, Ferré, and John Galliano designed to have such outstanding efforts, when the date, the Dione is that people still trust the brand , the pursuit, whether it’s clothing, leather, or cosmetics, perfume. Treasures of the town of card: Blue Gold Lipstick – DIOR mark of lipstick, rich, soft, color pure, in a comfortable and durable reached between the incredible balance. Is also essential for numerous women’s handbag Froebel. 5 Color Eyeshadow – although DIOR will launch a quarterly basis a variety of dazzling new make-up, but this eye shadow since 1987 until today, remains the favorite of many make-up artists and women.

Rural theft, predators who lost their natural enemies

November 4, 2015
Urbanization process is like a huge water pump, in more than 30 years sincethe reform and opening up, continue taking a young labor force in thecountryside. I of those fathers are, early of pioneer, carrying woman will young, unkempt, carry with big package small package, ride with box car, traveled thousands of km, bumps days several night, to Pearl River Delta, and Yangtze River Delta, into factory, do building, dwelling cottage, got by with taunt and disdain, in city people of superior and arrogance in the, obedient, hard and stubborn of please life. Year after year, generationafter generation, villagers regardless of the villagers, the father pulledtheir children, they were carried by the tide of economic and social trends,and flock to the cities, as the tide swept away debris deposited and lost inthe outside world.


They gave birth to their rural ties, left more blood and family ties, those who left their homes but older parents. For many people, home and fartheraway, in addition to the new year and happy and unhappy events, they haverarely set foot in the land. Telephone is a relatively regular channels ofcommunication, a new building of the buildings reflect the fruits of theirlabour, but closed shop all year round.


If the country is a large reservoir, the protracted loss of water, has nowdropped to the guard position.


Just like the desert, lose water, oasis of sand erosion. Villagesdisappeared, dying in the countryside, is a process of evolution that hastaken place and is still in. Had see a article reported, a area a a village fell, years constantly was home or out working, and or reading work, reasons relocation, last only left several households family, crops deserted, weeds lush, for decades years missing of Raptor beast reproduce trail, people of survival space had like sent inter line, constantly contraction, that beast began frequently haunted intrusion crops, even threat to people of security.Ecosystem imbalance, many not the phenomenon have emerged.


Theft is one of them. Theft is not a very common phenomenon? Not now thereare different to the past? Yes, before.


Past is Zhuang Hu family for big, thieves trembling, once found, even is huangkouxiaoer pulled open voice called reinforcements, also may get four townships eight o partisans echoed, handheld pole hoe Ben will came, thieves again big of courage, also inevitably scare have wits, again remained of, also only worn out layer Layer encirclement only picked up get small life of (exaggerated has points, but encountered folk tough of, caught Hou playing have kowtow begged for mercy is laxly things a pile). Complain aloudremnants of was the lively scene. Remember one night to hear abnormalmovement, got up, found in poultry were stolen, Dad brother immediatelyshouted, kicking shoes in hot pursuit, the thieves fled, Leng was chasing afeather. After my uncle heard, immediately called a bunch of young peoplecame out, just the whole thief dragged, nowhere to hide.


Now, old dad, brother of town, WA dare the thieves. They did, swagger for the door entrance, and swagger and roared off, mangy dog, mosquitoes fly,insatiable, wrapped around people not impatient, but he couldn’t help it.Thief takes this weakness. Last year, thieves opened a hole in the wall in the dark, put a house in the village of ducks and chickens stealing all, oldcouple both lie awake at night, or in the nose had been stolen, you’re nothateful and evil. There are worse, and a few years ago, Spring Festival isthe high incidence of theft of the season, now less and less seasonal, overa period of time, raids, after a period of time, to pick again. Timeperhaps, and often during the day under the guise of fishing, and the like,riding a motorcycle crawling around, nobody pushed open the door, andsomeone, muttered one, turn and run away. To get rich, first roads, nowhardened these roads to facilitate travel, can also greatly improve themobility of theft. Petty thefts in the past, development up to now, evenwith the use of the vans, booty directly the car pulled away, enabling fasttransfer.


As with the ecosystem of nature, balance, loss of predators, predators willthrive, eventually destroy the entire system. Now the village, leaving behind the elderly and the children left, and not with those of ease, rivalthe thief to steal for a living. Mainly in physical strength and reductionof the number of population, making the whole village mutual degradation. Of course, the assistance function also includes the neighborhoods of labourand mutual assistance, mutual care, these areas will discuss next.

MO do you dare to divorce |

If a divorced women to remarry, are more cautious and more prepared. Mostdirect idea is not to be brought about by a failed marriage pain anddiscomfort.


So, the concerns faced by divorced women remarry, what does? Might as wellcount the following concerns of divorced women remarried:


First, age concern: If a woman divorces between 30-40, remarried facedpressure is evident, there is old and there are small maybe, also boastabout their age, women over the age of 30, the so-called old, remarried, ageis limited.


Second, emotional concerns: the emotions of a woman much more delicate thanmen, women after divorce, always want more, for example, to find a man whowould man still as it used to, and if that is done, so will her ex-husband,which also concerns a woman marries again difficult.


Third, psychological concerns: divorced woman most is bad, if even this isnot timely corrected, will remarry are confused and afraid. After all,reconstituted families, to face the many psychological difficulties, do not.


Four is a family concern: women divorced, his side with a child, in order totake into account the child not to be a single parent, wanted to remarry andare afraid to be shot to another family, so limited by family, and remarrieda woman‘s concern.


Five are running concerns: perhaps divorced women remarry, considerationwill be given to the parties are divorced people, perhaps difficult to breakin feelings and emotions, such concerns, it is difficult to exclude andeliminate.


Six environmental concerns: a divorced woman, there are people who do notunderstand, even gossip. Divorce woman to live in the home, due to thespecial environment, some women are afraid to live in the home, if theremarriage was not successful, it would be a bigger joke, after all, thevillage folks, look in the eye is also embarrassing things.


Seven is an economic concern: divorce women, divorce had not been not onlyfinancial compensation may have to live with their children, if married, whois going to bear these costs, it also taboo a remarried woman.


Eight is the size concerns: divorced women, especially women who had achild, every aspect of the body vary, and some fat, those with physicalhealth is getting worse, which is also remarried a woman‘s concern, afraidpeople think and have an inferiority complex.


Nine are children‘s concerns: a divorced woman, lived with their children,if married, regardless of, after all, and again on a family with children,faced with a strange fusion, sometimes psychological burdens and barriers.


Ten are sexual concerns: a divorced woman, after all, very mature, sex is anatural thing, long repressed libido, upon remarriage, after great demandwill affect the other half, it‘s become things of concern to remarry awoman, can not be avoided.


In fact, divorced women remarry, does have sufficient psychologicalpreparation, if you act in haste, perhaps the dilemma facing divorce.Indeed, these concerns are also women have faced, if these concerns can beeliminated, remarried to a more perfect, at least, will also light up heart,otherwise, it is better to remain single, may be less trouble.

Five people five ability and five kinds of outcomes

October 22, 2015
In ancient times, people would divide people into the belief systems, and Ihave good character, capacity and role, and five people;


First, leaders, high moral character, impartiality, as the cause of life,able to anticipate and prevent problems, deciding, BR;


The second, leading talents, ended play dares to spell, when career professional, being able to detect and solve problems, can lead toentrepreneurship;


A third helper, one random obedience, love and dedication, when jobs career,but hard to solve problems, work, responsibility for the family;


Fourth, the team, free lazy and never take responsibility, when the burden of professional, I do not know where the problem lies, and why, which innumbers, it will do no good,


Fifth way, scum, arrogant, no discipline, when the dog dish Bowl, would addcumbersome to create problems and complaining to spoil things.


Therefore, as long as we support leaders, respect, solidarity and help, goodstaff, clean scum, walk hand in hand, hard, Moritami, and people and things,and rectifies.

I learned to ride

Not long ago, my mother gave my brother buys a bike, watching my brother to go by bike to ride, my itching. I told the mother, mother said: nothing,and have the time I’ll teach you!


I hope the stars the Moon and finally look forward to free mother. I sit onmy brother loved the bike, he looked very distressed, afraid I broke him. Ican’t wait to put a foot on the pedal and jerked forward, one foot loose,set foot on the pedal, hard riding, handlebars don’t work, suddenly felldown. I stood up, and tried it a few times, not only not learned, also hurt his leg and hand. I cried injustice, MOM seemed to understand that I wanted to give up, said: failure is the mother of success, only you, success willcome to you, if you give up, the success will be away from you. Listen tomother‘s words, I practice more carefully. Time passed unknowingly, andsuddenly, the mother was pleased to shout success! You learned to ride abike! I quickly put a stop the car, know that my mother had not onlyhelped, but follow me trot. At this time, my heart was full of happy.


Riding a bike that’s very interesting, although it is difficult to bewrestling, but I know that as long as there is perseverance, grind an iron rod into a needle, the truth.

Hurry that year

Hurry that year


Friends hard to come by, but most of the time, we lack trust, do not need tounderstand. Signature


Time is still there, but Enron? We of that year‘s most hilarious, but now isa quiet loner, this is not the inevitable course, but our common choice.


That year, memories began to blur, vaguely remembers being small partnerswith handcuffs attached to a tree, a young girl ran to ignore the threat offriends moved reinforcements after the handcuffs became my first real toys.


That year, listening to the wind is the rain, particularly immunizationinjections, fear is beyond imagination, also hear someone sneaking out fromhiding in the morning till 9 o’clock in the evening.


That year, in order to be a big problem, I sneak out the door a few fingers,hands is not enough to take out the feet. (Reading website: www.sanwen.NET)


That year, with elderly grandmother go to the well to draw water, smalleffort coupled with the sudden change, breaking the head (natural, somedetails in my memory not because their causes, but on the people. ) Laterbecause the doctor is incompetent, penicillin allergy, and left a very deepshadow.


In those years, even the haircuts are afraid, like every beheading. In thoseyears, with sister secretly to their classroom, hiding in the back, butlearn to back a few Chinese poem, although do not know what that means, inthose years, ever since the little girl and smaller partners have found anew friend, and at that time I was very independent.


That year, reluctantly, a variety of admissions, a whole month hiding underthe desk, the teacher came to me crying, but fortunately met teacher, in hisdeliberately slowly out of fear.


That year, School Division, the other schools often come to make trouble, asyounger, often bullied, too, with his elementary school classmates inplaying particularly well, that period of time, whether a student or ateacher, will be a lifetime memory.


That year, the school incorporated another new teacher, not used to it.Because the same talk with nothing to fear against principals, all ideas aregone, do not like talking, reading aloud straight down.


That year, a change of teachers in the field, he live, ask two students to agroup at noon every day to wash his clothes, and then was assigned to agroup of very beautiful girls, wanted to do well, but not, so do look onlyon the edge all the time. Even more important was that year, serious declinein all levels, and several were forced to repeat the grade.


That year, the teachers when their children finally could not stand it,strong demand has replaced the foreign teacher, although he only taught usthe language.


That year, the measure may be more than some, at least for me, definitelymuch better than three serious times. Always accompany star back home,everybody‘s gone, leaving us a class, that kind of feeling is very subtle,the first sense that everyone is a whole, and only felt between two peopleso kind.


In those years, although not too many memories, but come to think of it isalways so sweet. To my classmates always wind, always just like to stand up,but slowly changed, scruples, and people do not like it used to be.


That year, with expectations of teachers expectations of achievement uponentering secondary school, I was feeling, but look uncomfortable himselfinevitably sad. That year, because of trouble and my mom, at home playing with fire, and finally to control irresponsible after running away from home, in fact, that is also scared not light. Or that year, in the case ofschools could make the arrangements, not out of school, not eating for aweek, immortal nickname.


That year, summer going to cram school, a group of people day and nightplaying chess, and then hooked up, completely out of English, level of chessknown, always let the people (of course only horses and Cannon). Togetherunder the and most of the pieces studied lore.


That year, big snow, buried a lot of memory, it seems all is as blank as thesnow, so sudden.


In those years, has been in a rebellious mood, as long as the guests, alwaystry to make him uncomfortable, sister‘s friend watching TV always running tochange the channel, his father‘s friend in chat and back in past and loud ortea run, OK and friends around the scourge. Also sometimes like to seereaders, meaning forest, such as chicken soup for the soul magazine.


That year, nervously into the expected high school that semester, Grandma,Dad had a car accident, finals 6 section 80 (language numbers out of 150),but it seems that they are very heavy, but the more do not like talking.


That year, the only time pay close attention to mathematics, thankfully,mathematical unlike English, none fell into a nightmare.


That year, the first time a person out of town, I feel everything isstrange, but watching someone else with a pile a stack of information onexam review, excited at that moment become lost, too many questions, I‘venever seen, I’m just here to get soy sauce.


Blundering peace of mind a lot in those years, begin to love and friendsalong the river walk, like to listen to quiet music. Also in those years,like Qin‘s Moon and Kyushu fantasies, to start paying attention to the animeand novels, but then on the Internet novel more and more disappointed.


That a years, due to various reasons, entrance are sleepy has, and due to various reasons and dad mom anger, regardless of regardless of to out waves,, back of when has is took notice has, then is various Banquet, first times drink has wine, only know wine is not others said of as, also not book SHANG wrote of that taste, in I seems it somewhat bitter, is is not like, but also is drink has many, and no think heroism dry cloud, just slightly headache, also is has many students drunk has, at himself also strong loaded calm, Down a run, sure enough fell, but got so happy. Reluctantly, stillvowed to University after a few days. Many thanks to one man, just becausethe other person will no longer have contact with him.


That year, after the familiar environment, gradually more villagers, thefamiliar students, said: some people say College is a PIN Zhi cave, we willslowly sink. He was dismissed, and decided he must not be changed. Alsothat year, met a group of people, with a faithful heart, grow accustomed tousing chat software chat.


That year, immersed in the banner below and chat, Internet access no longerjust like I used to look up the information or say hello to acquaintancescan’t help saying a few joke, couldn’t help watching anime. Also that year,the students introduced me to object, but only met, ate a meal, not then.Preyed on, not feel pity, just live up to the good intentions of thestudents, as a boy, what the Chase Chase others Yes, we found under thestairs as well. Then they find that they have changed, not so serious abouteverything, had been secretly under the commitment has not.


That year, for the campus, this style better than there, but they are stillthat way, like a driver’s license, is further delay. But the summer back,the most beloved first teacher and my dad when it comes to me, said twowords I can’t forget: you do not know your son, dead tired won’t say he istired. He‘s changed. Ask yourself again and again, exactly what has becomeover the years, alienated those close to each other, who respect one sigh,what happened. On that rainy night, was scolded by the teacher, is despised by students, called back and my dad had a fight, one scoop of Tang sat onenight, found the rain did not keep people awake, silently deleted 60% ‘sfriends.


In those years, fascinated by ancient customs, also because they like on aparticular aversion people trampled on, for those who hold ancient when thecover, all kinds of parallel sentences, rhetoric, East moved west upsentences, angrily arguing with other people all the time, which hasoffended a lot of people, but also to become inexplicably restless, andslowly more and more annoying. In those years, it has been struggling, butnot mature, but learning to be a hypocritical and paranoid. Gradually,accustomed to using someone else‘s name, tell their own stories. In thoseyears, just like the phrase use wrong, kill, most of time floating foam.Like a dream, so far everything feels so unreal.


That year, another round of graduation season, remembered when he firstgraduated, first teacher, wrote the poem: advise you not spare Witch Hazelnight, cherish only your young days, flowers to gather it folded, lest youbut wait for an empty Bough. Time can prove a lot of things, but more is todestroy something. That year, hauling a pile of luggage went a lot ofplaces, but not in the mood to see the scenery, then again after thewayward, but nothing has changed.


That years small partners are also points faction has does, that years became gas proud of bent on thought exam only others copy himself of copies does, that years and others sent message led to walk hit tree does, that years small partners are quiet has, literary has, himself became loss has, that years began wrote novel has, but has no one full of, that years to someone sent has article junior high school wrote of log screenshots, date is is 2013, in, not to asked Xia only deep table disappointed. That years first times to students home dinner, that is embarrassing get now himself are wants to find a to sewing drilling to, that years in full is man Jia of road quietly see with sunset, that missed has car, that years with filled with of failed of resentment and life of upset and sister fight has, that years because a sentence words of moved dark love had a girl a months, that years what are not understand, what thing are asked a students, but graduated Hou slowly alienated has, now are find not to reason…… Memoryconfusion, can’t remember which is which anymore years.


Time extension, and people are already numb, the wind stopped, unfinishedstory but also to renew it?

My Life log © 2020